Entry #8- Lessons In Love: Growing Through Heartbreak

 Love. It can make you shine like gold and it can also tear you down in ways you never thought possible. But how do people work through being at the lowest points in their lives due to heartbreak? Many would hide away, and others move on like it was just a drop in the bucket, and others learn from it. Whatever path someone may be on, there is a purpose to the healing process. And what matters at the end of the day is what is learned from these past relationships. 

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Now love may be defined as loving a partner that you are intending to have a life with, but there are many versions of love all around. There is love and loss in every kind of relationship out there. Weather it is from a significant other, a parent, an animal, or even a job or activity, love is everywhere you look. 

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In an experience I heard about from a friend described the relationship between a boy and a girl. They came together after being close friends. The girl was unfortunately being abused by her ex partner. When she had finally had enough courage to leave this boy she went to her friend for help. He brought her out and gave her a safe space to stay. And after some time they got together. While they both believed that they were happy something was always wrong. Something was missing between them.  She missed the love that she had with her ex despite the pain and abuse she experienced while being with him. She couldn't communicate her feelings in fear of being judged by her current boyfriend. So she devised a plan with her ex so that they could be together without hurting her current boyfriend. The two ex lovers went out and ran a red light in attempts to kill themselves. However, she survived and her ex had sadly passed away. When she woke up and decided to fake having amnesia in order to continue the original plan of leaving her boyfriend. The relationship was over, she was free from what she thought she wanted.

                                    

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In this experience the two lacked communication with the ability to understand. The girl did not feel comfortable to communicate her true feelings with her boyfriend. And her boyfriend did not provide a space for her to feel safe to come to him. In all of these mistakes both were left hurt and confused. Among many other emotions that come with heartbreak. The boy learned that he should never jump into a relationship without knowing a person and their previous traumas and relationship habits. She learned that a healthy relationship is hard to get used to after being torn down for so long, but it is worth it in the end to be happy everyday and not scared to love. 

They could have let these  experiences and lessons lead them to never trust another again. And they could have let these experiences destroy them as a person. Let their hearts grow cold and put their hurt onto others. But they didn't, they watched the fire between them die and they chose to never blame the pain and use it to hurt other souls. They watched the fire die and wanted to give it love time and time again. 

So learn from the past. Learn from the hurt. Let the hurt consume you if that is what needs to happen for you to see that there is still good out there. But, don't sit in that pain forever, and take the time to learn and grow as a person  and better yourself in the making. There is always going to be damage. People hurt people. But, you have the power to not let that damage you've experienced to hurt others in the process. 

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Until next time, continue loving you as best you can.